Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Lesson Planning While Drunk.

I learned an important lesson today. Mixing allergy medicine with lack of that wonderful rejuvenating fluid we call water can yield disastrous results! And caffeine does not remedy the situation. Oh, no. It certainly doesn't.

Here's what happened. I got a little busy, you know? I may have skipped lunch to talk about the Whorf-Sapir hypothesis with Dr. Coffee Beans. Okay, I did skip lunch. I generally neglected to drink any fluids throughout the day. I made it home just fine (because my empty stomach kept me focused on getting myself to the dinner table). Approximately two minutes after the table was cleared, however, I crashed.

As in, didn't even make it through the first of four readings. I simply had to read the short stories and write a lesson plan that would apply Fretag's Pyramid. Remember that plot outline? Set up, rising action, climax, falling action, resolution? Apparently that's Gustav Fretag's organizational skills. Suffice to say I did not get so far as the rising action of the first reading. Um, yea.

Took an hour nap and woke up worse than before it. So much for a power nap, eh? Then finished the first reading and tried to make it into the second but found myself nodding off by the first paragraph. And, let me just add, the reading is interesting! Took another nap and woke up feeling like I downed two bottles of night time Nyquil.

In other words, it feels like someone stuffed a pillow in my brain. Additionally, two Serta counting sheep have claimed my eyelids and have bedded down on them, forcing my eyes shut. I have a feeling you could tell me that there had been a terrible mistake and my entire family had died and all I would be able to manage as a reply was, "Mm? I just wanna sleep five more minutes, Mommy...five more...zzzz."

Rhetorical Twist, this was just a dramatization. I promise I will drink lots of water tomorrow and eat a healthy lunch. No worries.

Academic Standards: Students, there won't be a test on this. Use your No. 2 pencil to write the following on your SCANTRON, "In case of fire, throw this in."

Visual learning aid to help illustrate my productivity level today:


Rhetorical Twist said...

Teacher Poet--I laughed at your cleverly written entry, and then I thought, "hey! This is REAL!" and was prepared to give you a lecture. However, it appears you have already lectured yourself, and thus I do not need to. Good job. You have learned well.

Michael5000 said...

That last part was helpful for us visual learners.